It was 5:27 pm and he wanted to go to the early bird special because well, he is a wealthy businessman after all, so itâs understandable to take advantage of all the deals he could get and grab the best seat in the house with priceless NYC views.
You may be wondering how does this prestige individual have the time to meet a nobody acne-prone inbound college student?
Well, that was why.
See folks, let me just give you a PSA.
For more opportunities to be presented in your life, you must stand out.
Iâm not talking about trying to impersonate someone in hopes of them liking you or dying your hair pink to stand out in the crowd, I mean skipping ahead years in your life to see whatâs out there before its too late and taking risks that are only for the better.
There are two types of risk.
A risk can either be bad or good.
Skydiving or swimming with sharks, are mostly bad risks. Sure, theyâre exhilarating but also very dangerous and deadly. Nothing truly benefits you in the future by performing these, unless you are trying to achieve some Genius World Record for the youngest skydiver or trying to win a dare with an animal that loves you as their favorite snack.
And there are good risks that donât hurt but are still considered risks because normally those your age, wouldnât go for it.
In my case, it was cold calling hiring managers in the business world, ask if I could intern there as a 17-year-old and tell them exactly what I could provide.
As a heads up, in order to provide something meaningful, check out their website, careerâs page and make sure you know the business inside and out so you sound already part of the clan.
Why was this a risk?
Well, I applied for a job I had barely any experience in so I could gain the best experience. Being the youngest intern ever, they were amazed by my courageousness and so much so I ended up working as the longest intern at the firm.
I wish I was younger again, not because I want to be able to eat more junk food and not be bloated like a pig the next day but be able to take more risks. These days, the older I get the more professional, stern, uptight, career-focused, and too processed I get.
I didnât think about that early bird dinner much when I was an innocent teen fresh out of the weeds of high school with a guy shorter than me. He just looked like my dadâs best friend which made me very comfortable. Also, when you are younger, people expect less becuase they assume you are dumb so that gave me a leg up in itself. I just wanted an internship outside of my parentâs firms because that would make me decently proud inside and give me the experience I was craving before stepping into the real world.
People are people. If you want something, donât think about it, just have somewhat of a logical plan and execute. See what happens and go from there and so I did. If I were to do that today, it wouldâve taken be weeks to convince myself to reach out as a self doubter.
I tried to order something clean not greesy or messy that wouldnât require me to use my fingers such as a juicy burger or pizza and definitely not something too pricey.
Yet, at Wolfgang Puck, there is no such thing as inexpensive. The cheapest meal is roughly $40-$50, something I felt embarrassed about ordering. And just as a reference, the cheapest meal, and this changes seasonally but it was something of the lines of, âSlim chicken on a bed of raw lettuce, scallions, onions and what tasted like grass.â I felt like a cow. But my focus wasnât on the food, it was on the present moment, something I lose track of these days surrounded by technology, comparison and older age.
Since I was younger, I didnât think too much of the internship until this early bird silent dinner. It felt like at that time a lightbulb switched off and I started to become older at that moment. I started to become tenser, overthink things, analyzed everything, and felt immense pressure to live up to his expectations that were made up. I was tense instead of casual and awkward instead of funny. I wanted to go back to being younger and myself.
I thought it was just the dinner that caused these nerves, trying to handle eating the dinner politely, while making assertions, feeling dizzy nodding every time he said something I didnât understand. I knew a little nervousness was normal, especially since this is my boss that unexpectedly hired me straight out of HS with no experience and that I had to juggle speaking professionally and handle food at the same time, not an easy task, but after the meal, I couldnât let go of these feelings of pure anxt.
Since then, Iâve constantly made assumptions that something always went wrong, regretful about my decisions, and embarrassed by my own imaginary actions.
Now as I look back, it was definitely for the better. I learned earlier than later about how my mindset affects me more than anything and what power I have to control it. From a leader of the corporate world, he taught me more about myself than I couldâve found out on my own playing puzzle or diving into some chocolate cake.
Ever happens to you?
Youâll be surprised when you start hanging out with people you are scared of.
They amaze you back.
Oh, and if you were curious what he ordered, it was the white not brown pasta with Vodka sauce, the 2nd cheapest thing on the menu with iced water not even wine on the side. But he did pay something, something I didnât expect considering that his meal was not CEO worthy according to stereotypical rich standards.
So you may be looking to hang out with these types of elite people. I get it. Itâs a game of luck and chance but what Iâve outlined above hopefully can teach you that letting go of fear especially when you are young, is the easiest path you can take to help guarantee a front-row seat to the person you want to meet.
This guy didnât just teach me about things I never realized about myself, he demonstrated to me skills key essentials Iâve applied since the end of HS that have turned my life upside down in various areas.
Lesson #1: Learn the Power of No
During our conversation, he started talking about the concept of time a lot, like the whole time. I donât know if he was ready to set up his will or go on a safari that he might never retreat from or what, but he was weirdly conscious of the time he has left on earth.
He isnât a philosophical guy, thankfully just like me, so we didnât go Mariam Williamson in-depth as she did in the 2016 Presidential Debate, but the concept of time was illustrated in a serial way during our conversation.
He outlined to me how much time we have in our day. Obviously, itâs 24, no surprise but when you start to dissect how many times you check your phone, the moments people bother you during your flow states and how much time you spend worrying about things that arenât in your control, you start buying back time and seizing it.
To anyone that knows the power of wealth, they visualize time as their greatest asset because no matter how much money you have, you can never buy it back.
It means freedom, creativity, boredom, and more success, defined in your own terms down the road.
He bought pasta and water because he doesnât care about fancy dinners. Pasta suits him enough and wine will just slow him down. He cared about spending his time on me, away from the menu, and hard-earned 7 figure paycheck on appreciating assets, never depreciating ingredients that go out in a few hours. And to be fair, he believes food is crucial to live and work effectively, as we will discuss in the next point, but paying an extra $20 for whole wheat pasta just wasnât on his priority list.
Your time is precious and you have to take the best care of it. Everyone is special but may not be as important to you. You donât have to be a top CEO in the world to say no to people. You should never be fired for saying you cannot make the meeting once in a while or no to the lunch that you want to spend time with yourself. You design your life by focusing on getting back your time.
Lesson #2: You Are What You Eat
Health is wealth. To be fair, he didnât order the healthiest meal in the land. White pasta is full of carbohydrates and vodka sauce is all sodium, whole cream milk, and a touch of tomato paste but disregarding the food entirely, when you look at the portion size, thatâs what can be argued matters most beneficial.
Everything in life requires moderation and diversification.
For example, with your finances, you never want all of your assets pooled up in 1 investment in case it tanks and never want to eat the same food every day or else your body wonât function at itâs best as with a variety of nutrients. You can eat chocolate cake every day after dinner, but only a sliver, hence the moderation effect.
Once he told the waiter his order, he said he hasnât had pasta in years! And that was no exaggeration, Iâve seen him eating salads and veggies at his desk for forever with no double or triple portion in sight. Thatâs what keeps him healthy.
In America, we associate food with diet and our weight. It has nothing to do with that. Food is just fuel and is makes you up. What you feed your body is a representation of how you feel and what you can do in life to win it.
Eating a whole food balanced diet with limited processed foods and sugar is the best way to go. This is replicative of the paleo diet that is followed in the Blue-Zone parts of the world such as in Greece and Japan where residents tend to live the longest. But they also donât restrict desserts and happiness as we do in America nor have a gym on each corner to waste their time and end up eating more.
They compliment exercise as a part of their daily routine, walking, sitting and squatting and commuting and make food fun, an enjoyable togetherness activity that is shared not timed accordingly to the clock.
Along with your time, money cannot buy back your health. That is your priority and especially you youngsters reading, donât fall trap to what the âcoolâ yet really âuneducatedâ kids are doing at parties or whatever becuase their faulty actions will haunt them later in life and have to pay a hefty price with higher insurance, medical bills, and sadly, the shorter chance of life.
Lesson #3: Meetings are a waste of time unless you have a plan, goal, and clear solution
I have to agree with him on this one. Strongly. Despite being a part of at least 3 meetings on average daily from school to work, Iâve never been a fan of them becuase they are never effective, productive, and just drain me out, just like school!
I was surprised with the way my boss said he hosts meeting becuase ironically it is the same way I do. He dislikes them as well and tries to avoid them. We both love meeting people, sharing ideas, driving insight, and of course making business so there is no better way to perform those initiatives than cancel meetings altogether.
Instead, short get-together, âlaunchpadsâ as he calls them are formed when ideas should already be planted and teammates just meet to confirm a strategy. Brainstorming should happen prior to meetings because most of the time people donât prefer thinking out loud, thatâs why consulting interviews are tricky!
By the time the 30-minute max âlaunchpadâ rolls around on the beautifully rainbow calendar, ideas are already formulated, speaking notes are cast, and assign seats are implemented. Welcome to Pre-K.
And with my experience, just like with working in short bursts and taking small incremental breaks in between, this is the ideal length for meetings as well.
Work smarter > Harder.
Quality > Quantity.
Lesson #4: Patience, Persistence, and Positivity
These are the things that can propel your chances of getting anything, anywhere you want that also require no skill:
-Being nice
-Being on time
-Having a smile
-Giving a compliment
-Sharing
-Being organized
-Having patience, persistence, and positivity
In any situation, the 3 Ps are key. Iâve adopted this since HS and used it in every interview to a professor Iâve met. Not only people will rave about you to others, but they will also ask you to continue sharing their insight and possibly speak at events becuase you are just one of a kind!
Make your life easier with the 3 Ps, please.
Lesson #5: Be 100% Comfortable With What You Donât Know
Being confident doesnât mean you are an extrovert that loves to talk about yourself. No one wants to be with a know it all and everyone can become confident, regardless your height or Myers Briggs results. They want someone relatable, personable, honest, and genuine to lead the world.
Downplaying yourself can be the best driver for change and connection becuase people can see themselves in you. Without similarity, it is harder to initiate that bond.
Stop being the smartest person in the room becuase then you wonât learn as much as you should have and wasted your time and energy. When you lower the expectations of trying to be the best or a âknow it allâ, you seek more connection and identity within yourself.
Who would have thought that a 40-minute early bird special would teach me more about life than a 6 hour Thanksgiving brunch marathon? It was more special than I thought!
Come into a situation expecting nothing in return becuase that is when the unexpected happens. Enjoy life, take your calculated chances and then you can continue adding to this list and I will learn alongside you.
Happy chatting.