Showing off never leads one to a better place yet many will never be convinced.
As a teenager, I find it embarrassing and frankly awkward to see peers of mine flaunt their belongings to the point where it looks overly fake, devious and silly. Up to a point, itâs clearly just for show.
Overtime with an overabundance of possessions and materialistic junk, these things end up taking over oneâs life and their personality starts to fade.
With the latest FinTech technology of âAfterPayâ, âBuy Now, Pay Laterâ or immediate loans at your fingertips through SoFi, more than half of the things we own and borrow are a waste. People buy things they donât need with money they donât have due to insecurity, jealousy, lack of dedication, extreme impatience and loneliness. With a lack of motivation in life to work and find a passion, you are doomed. Retiring isnât as glamorous as you may think.
I could be wrong though. I have a few great pals who only insist on buying luxury top-rated goods that position them on the verge of bankruptcy each month. They seem joyous every time they step outside the door but most likely arenât inside. You would never think twice according to the outside that they would be crunching their spending to the pennies with their luxurious outfits, due to their strong personality, demeanor, posture, mindset, degrees, relationships and knowledge bank yet internally they are broke. My palsâ bank accounts are gasping for air yet they look completely fine and donât seem to care until it hits them hard around the corner every so often.
I have a little more sympathy if you became broke after your dream startup flopped but even then you shouldâve weighed your options and not been so aggressive and unrealistic. Yet becoming broke for other people is on a whole other level that I cannot fathom nor sympathize with. That is pure laziness and lack of control.
I donât know about you but I could never sleep at night if I was living it up like that. As a child of immigrants Iâve been programmed to live below my means and donât mind it one bit since itâs given me a purpose to stay frugal and appreciate what I already have. Stop paying attention to what you donât have and start paying attention to what you do have.
I prefer to save until it hurts yet never to the point of being cheap. Might as well spend more if youâre cheap. Living frugally isnât buying McDonalds to save a couple bucks or buying $20 shoes and having to throw them out to end up buying 6 more $20 pairs of shoes. Iâm not that silly and nor should you be. Shoes arenât considered a true appreciating asset yet you need to walk so invest in your feet to reduce the medical bills down the road.
Blurred Image
As wealth has been disproportionally transferred to the shareholder class since the rise of financialization in the 80âs thanks to technology, frothy asset prices, inflation, globalization, and the real estate boom(s), image and prestige have not.
In fact, theyâve gone downward for the most strategic reasons.
As weâve witnessed during the pandemic till today, the stock market is mostly not related to the economy. Sure investors will glance out their window and observe the majority of the population crumbling while they sit in their 4th beach home yet they trade in future time, not today so they must bounce back and before they know it, the major indexes end up reaching an all time-high while the world is a disaster. Welcome to the stock market. The market that is itâs own. To date, the S&P 500 has been up roughly 20% since last year.
Not bad but quite sad.
Not only that, asset prices have skyrocketed to levels that donât make any sense to anyone anymore and analysts donât know what to base their findings or predictions off of. Reddit feed or the smell of cheese?
Investments or shall I say imaginary possessions with no internal rate of return from Bitcoin to NFTs took flight in a rollercoaster ride all while the top 10% bought their 3rd beach homes and the lower to middle class struggled to surpass the earnings their parents made let alone had trouble paying their own bills. Itâs disappointing to fathom that America, the wealthiest and so-called âunitedâ country has one of the most evident wealth gaps and indifferences in frankly everything.
Wealth inequality is a disastrous problem that policy makers to Wall Street makers donât want to tackle but something that must be resolved.
Coincidentally in the meantime, the transfer of image and symbol of wealth are getting a long-overdue remodel. Billionaires are no longer interested in golden Porsches and fancy Great Gatsby dinner parties as much as they used to and instead pouring their wealth into things that donât make sense to 99.9% of the world but are perfectly reasonable for themselves like a rocket competition and unnecessary overpriced yacht.
On the street, specifically in NYC, itâs becoming harder and harder to spot who is from what class which is a great thing.
Everywhere in the world, in every city to county, there are less and more expensive areas yet by just taking a stroll, itâs difficult to decipher who is who and the rich are capitalizing on this secrecy.
Yet the proven way that never faults to identify someoneâs true wealth is by their primary residence. Sure as a fresh grad you can put 5% down on a 5 million dollar property but if you canât pay $20k per month including the HOA and mortgage, you canât live there. With majority of Americanâs wealth still tied up in their primary residence, which is dangerous and they clearly havenât learned their lesson from the Housing Crisis of â08, without their home, there would be little to no money to their name. Thatâs why diversification is key! Learn from history folks. It repeats after all!
If you can, never disclose your primary residence since others will make assumptions right away just like first impressions. I either use the billing address of my rental property or another home we rent out as much as possible for privacy and security. You donât have to be a celebrity to be a victim of identify theft. It can happen to anyone and usually happens to the most unexpected people that show off too much which lead a passing stranger on the street to become furious.
The New Equal?
Ever heard of the âdad shoeâ or Nostalgia 2000s looks? My generation is making it all a comeback. Despite the infatuation with social media, kids my age have somehow grasped that showing off is beyond bragging at this point and no one likes a know it all. Gucci is overrated and not an investment anymore. You can find something as charming for less.
I suppose youngsters donât show off as much as adults simply due to lack of funds and knowledge. They just want to make true friends not find a Bumble date.
To really progress in life, you need to prove yourself and that starts beyond looks, although they always seem to help especially when progressing in life and in your career. Read the unfair advantages in life here.
First impressions certainly matter on the spot but soon after without true personality, character or charm, you can only get so far.
The world is small and giving off a fake, dubious allure is not safe nor smart. People remember those who make them feel good. They donât remember your position or title, they look at what you can do for them and ultimately how many times you can get them to talk about themselves. Once you let them do that, they will love you forever. After all, thatâs why the most popular word in the English language is âIâ!
People are behind everything and not showing off is an easy step you can take to continue a lasting relationship or secure a job offer.
Is it just me or is showing off a true pain and hassle?
Donât Post the Pic
Why do people pay so much attention to living the most glamorous lifestyle for others and put so much attention towards living a life they donât want to live?
The media, influx of social media in our lives and pesky advertisements want us to live better lives. They convince us after getting that brand new car, we will be better and happier. Thereâs never enough and we canât find the line to stop. We are sold on fake promises.
As an FYI, the store doesnât care if you can or canât afford it. They want your sale and then allow you to remind yourself that you will figure out the rest later on.
We deceive ourselves and firmly believe we are better than everyone else. Our perception is flawed. Majority of us are average and thatâs all you need to be. Once you start believing you are more alike than different in terms of way of living, not character or uniqueness, you will feel more at ease and be your authentic self.
Itâs not perfect, itâs you. We donât need to be exceptional at anything nor try to fill the hole with guilt or shame. Who you are is enough and utilizing our energy on something more meaningful to really impact the world not just provide another dopamine hit to a strangerâs feed is always more beneficial. No question about it. In 20 years, let alone tomorrow, you wonât remember how many likes you got on that photo, you will remember the impact you had with that person.
Break the Cycle
We are living in a world of dopamine destruction and our bodies donât know how to handle it anymore. There are more suicides, rates of depression, drug abuse, sleep deprivation and anxiety that has been perpetuated all due to an inability to control ourselves, particularly online. Our bodies are unable to regulate this excess dopamine and we need more and more to feel normal which creates an endless spiral leading into a dark hole many donât confront nor know they are in.
As society, we watch the greats of the field. The top athletes that earn millions, the Bezos that own more wealth than any countryâs GDP could need and we naturally fall into the trap of comparing ourselves.
We constantly feel the need to prove something to someone because we are glued to our screens and otherâs fake lives. Highlight reels are all that it is. No one will post an average day online.
I enjoy reflecting with my grandparents once in a while and ask them what they were like at my age, what was going on in their more controlled less distracted minds, who they looked up to and why.
To the best of their knowledge, they tell me they never did as much as I do in a day . They had a role when they went to work and thatâs it. They didnât tackle 3 side hustles on their lunch break or schedule to take a phone call. They looked up to the people they knew not based on net worth. They didnât take a chunk out of their day to exercise to end up eating more. The craziest thing was they were never bored despite having less gadgets!
Obviously, although this age is drastically different due to technology which has flipped everything for better or for worse, we are forgetting each otherâs POV and how to make others feel appreciated and comfortable which starts with being around them. Even studies out of this pandemic have shown Kindergarteners donât know how to play or speak with one another anymore! They reach for their devices for more dopamine and pleasure instead when they are bored..
Stop the Start
Iâm sorry to say but everyone living in this age has some sort of addiction. Whether itâs sugar, or Netflix or exercise, we are slowly killing ourselves and all of this is intertwined within wealth in some sort of way.
If we could, we would absolutely want more money because most carry the false belief that more money can provide a better life and within social media, we are convinced with more dopamine hits, we will be happier. The algorithm works against us and we are trapped. Research has proven that with too much pleasure which we are getting from every source these days, does not bring more happiness. We have to work harder for it. It shouldnât come right away from opening an app.
In order to abolish the urge to Keep Up With The Joneses or present a false image about yourself which donât get me wrong isnât completely bad as we do it all the time in interviews or with meeting someone new in different situations and with certain people, it can get exhausting and ruin your life even more.
Ask yourself, whatâs the worst thing that can happen if you are your authentic self? If you actually wear whatâs most comfortable and not put so much effort into pleasing strangers what will occur?
When we are our authentic selfs, we are better at our craft. We focus on whatâs important, concentrate, focus better, are in lighter spirits, want to help people and get more done in all areas of our lives not just work related.
Showing off does no good for anyone, especially yourself.
You put yourself in jeopardy by showing off more than you can handle.
When people see what you own, they naturally get more jealous and will hunt you down.
Depending on how evil they may be, they might gossip, tell a lie behind your back, de-promote you or steal something all because they want your Gucci jacket!. This leads to an increased chance of income insecurity, loss of relationships, theft, scrutiny which the wealthy in particular cannot break as reputation is everything. It cannot be broken and the past cannot be erased.
If I had to bet, living a simple low profile life as Buffet does best provides one more time to enjoy lifeâs pleasures and be in a better mental state than someone who flashes everything and has to prove and fight for everything.
Hidden Wealth Is True Wealth
We all know wealth inequality exists and is evident in various facets of our lives but is becoming harder to spot especially amongst the upper class.
Itâs striking to see how celebrities or family-made business owners who inherited their wealth or had no education tend to flaunt more than those who worked their way up from the bottom and understand what each dollar is worth.
From penniless and living in their car to grinding day in and out finding their lucky break themselves all while staying humble as a billionaire is a noble act and very rare. Although Buffet and Bezos are valued at roughly the same amount less or more depending on the trading day, you can tell right away who came from wealth, worked as an investment banker, borrowed a couplet thousand from their parents, how money inflated their ego and which one is the same authentic down to earth person they were 9 decades ago.
Maybe the number gave it awayâŠ
With the abundance of ways to earn money these days, there are millions of secret millionaires and above out there that choose to go unnoticed because they know what matters most.
If you want to avoid a sticky situation that can harm your relationships, lifestyle or career, impress yourself no one else because at the end of the day, you will regret going into debt to buy that Birkin bag to flaunt to a stranger or for an Insta pic.
It is exhausting and a waste of your precious energy especially since itâs much easier and beneficial to live below your means and be you. Trying to prove your wealth status is draining and now inaccurate. If you are trying to prove something, more often than not you are probably the opposite of it and wish you could be different but cannot due to your frivolous spending habits.
Life doesnât have to be complicated and your bank account shouldnât burst every time thereâs a purchase. If you know what you need and who you want to really become, youâll do less work and enjoy the journey 10x more. Do it for yourself and impress yourself. See what you are capable of not what your account can handle.
Put the screens away and live a beautifully average life your way.
Please! Itâs too short.Â
If someoneâs jealous of you, you need to change it.
No one should be and you shouldnât be either.
And one last thing.
You donât need to post those vacation picks.