💍Why We Don’t Get What We Want

I could easily stop writing right now and no one will notice.

We want to believe we are special, but we cannot becuase we are waiting for approval.

As a sophomore in college, it is hard to be this age, and especially, younger.

Social media, technology, and all things digital are bombarding our lives and whenever we have a moment of silence, it must be occupied by other’s success.

I don’t know if it’s because we are becoming lazier, more comfortable with staying the same or simply wanting to copy each other, but I know that was never what I set my self up for.

Life is short but most of the time, I find it rather long.

Each day does go by fairly slow, especially in quarantine and I know with the immense amount of college breaks, extra contemplation is required.

I asked a few of my peers why they go to school.
Typical answers:
-Parents
-It is good for my future
-Classic: So I can learn

Yet, there isn’t a whole lot of learning that is done in the physical classroom that most of us seem to not understand.

Just because we busted our life to get the top ACT score, hire a tutor, and allow our parents to help us get into the school of our dreams, doesn’t mean we are set or should be proud, at all.

I didn’t realize this until I got to NYU.

College classes are shorter, less frequent that allow for independence, and there is way too much free time us teenagers are not used to.

Back in HS, I needed to dedicate one day a month to simply breathe.

Countless extracurriculars, projects, clubs didn’t mean much at the end but in the moment then, they felt like my life depended on it.

I didn’t do anything I truly enjoyed except for out of school when I got to teach girls how to code and play tennis.

I’ve always been a fan of self-help and been the one student who knows a bit of everything, never specialized which turned out to be an advantage for me.

I decided to start Boiled Not Fried during quarantine becuase I was fed up with this wasted potential.

I knew I needed to do what excites even though life does feel rather long and that’s not a good thing.

I wanted to speed life up by filling up my days with excitement and happiness.

No more sleep, eat, hw, sports practice, repeat.

Flash forward to today.

I’m writing here to spread value and as cheezy and ‘whatever’ that means to you, I know that this helps one person the most, myself to become grounded and excited for the next day.

It not only calms me down but pumps me up.

My days start with writing about my experiences and lessons I’ve learned in order to help one or two of you who might need it.

Now that is a true testament of knowing you enjoy something when you do it for yourself.

It’s not being selfish, it’s being realistic and honest.

We need more of that in our lives because we put less effort into things that don’t go our way or we don’t expect.

To this day, we have a substantial following of a couple of thousand loyal readers but for a few months, it was only me and the dark web.

For most that would be a challenge that would make them upset and eventually give up.

But with a mindset shift and some proven lessons, that can all change.

Some advice that has allowed me to be present and sincere with myself:
1. You can’t change unless you go through a challenge
2. The best feeling is when you tell yourself you cannot do something and then you surprise yourself
3. We talk to each other not with each other and being diverse isn’t being distant it is learning about the other perspectives you don’t have to agree.

4. We learn the art of knowing how to say no but why is saying yes? If you don’t have too many obligations, the worst thing you can do is say no!

Regrets will come and why wouldn’t you go for it?

5. No experience is bad experience unless you make it out to be.

Along with my top pet peeve, procrastination, when we say, we don’t have enough time that irks me as well.

If Obama has enough time to write several novels while in office, we all have enough, especially too much as college students.

You don’t need to start something because everyone else is.

If you want to focus on school, go for it, and loading up your plate with nonsense curriculars that don’t add value is worse.

Do it because you want to.

Simple as that.

I want to look back on Boiled Not Fried and see the contributions I’ve added to your lives and most importantly mine.

Why I Started: I’ve grown out of hating writing since I was told I was never good at it and now accepted it is a weakness that I can turn into my best strength.

To find something you enjoy must be beyond monetary gain or acceptance/approval.

It must start with you because you are the captain of your ship.

We don’t get what we want because we don’t bother looking for it.

We want it now, Postmated to us immediately or else it is too hard.

Everyone is mediocre and only the best in class in their field wake up every day enjoying life because they have a choice to love and add more, not a forcefulness attached to it.

If you want to start getting what you want out of life not from the store, you need to make sure you are putting effort into something that you will want to receive as a gift in the future and look back upon as a good choice, not a faulty mistake.